When Logic Isn’t Enough: Becoming Emotionally Intelligent

Introduction to Inside Out Engineering

Author

Nikki Maginn
May 16, 2025

I never set out to start a company — I truly did not think of myself as an entrepreneur. As an engineer, the risk seemed too great. I valued certainty and predictability. 

It’s actually why I became an engineer, to better understand the world around me and predict what was going to happen next. 

Whether fortunately or unfortunately (I’ll let you decide), I live in a world filled with humans. And humans, while predictable en masse, are fairly unpredictable up close.

You might be thinking, Nikki, that’s not true! Everyone has patterns of behavior! And you’d be right. People do have patterns based on lived experiences. But the thing is, we don’t understand those patterns until we get to know one an other. 

Which brings me to why we're here. Building connection is foundational to understanding each other and the world around us which is why Inside Out Engineering is founded on connection, neuroscience, and resiliency.

In each newsletter I’ll share stories of how I built the foundational skills of emotional intelligence: empathy, self awareness, self regulation, motivation, and relationship management — also known as social skills. And share a tip for how you can develop this skill more for yourself!

But before I talk more about Inside Out Engineering, I’d like to introduce myself.

Let’s start at the top. Who is Nikki Maginn and how did I cultivate this ability to understand human behavior and turn it into something teachable to others?

Well, my origin story starts in early childhood. I had a front row seat to a full spectrum of human behavior growing up: I’m the oldest of 5 kids, 4 girls and one boy, in a very large & multi-cultural family.

You can imagine the chaos of a 7 person household plus the myriad of pets we collected over the years. And that chaos afforded me an opportunity to live and breathe the psychology most people just see in text books.

As a simple example, as a child I noticed how some of my family members were naturally comfortable in social settings, while others weren’t. I was one of those naturally talkative kids who could strike up a conversation with strangers, much to my parents’ dismay when I’d approach random people in stores and give them our home phone number…

But even then, I didn’t see it as a skill — it was just something I could do.

It wasn’t until my dad began pushing me out of my comfort zone that I started to recognize emotional intelligence as something that could be developed. 

He made me do things that terrified me at the time, like calling campsites during our family trips to make reservations. I was between eight and ten years old, and I hated it. Talking to complete strangers on the phone, not being able to see their faces? It felt like such a huge, insurmountable challenge. How did I know what they were thinking if I couldn’t see them smiling or nodding or shaking their heads? 

I would even sit down and write myself scripts for exactly what to say… and sometimes I still draft out talking points for big conversations to this day.

But as he kept encouraging me to try, I got better at it. Eventually, I wasn’t afraid of the phone anymore, and I even began to enjoy those interactions. I could hear the smile in someone’s voice or notice when my kindness brightened their day from the change in their tone. 

Happy The Goldbergs GIF by ABC Network

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The defining moment came later, during my flight training. Talking to air traffic control was a completely different level of discomfort. I had to communicate with strangers I’d never meet, and it was critical for safety. It was a survival moment — quite literally — because you can’t land a plane in controlled airspace without speaking to the tower. Overcoming that fear showed me that what once felt impossible could become second nature with practice.

This pattern repeated throughout my life and career. In college, I noticed how some of my engineering classmates avoided presentations or team discussions, delegating tasks to work independently. In contrast, I thrived in situations that required engaging with others, like project management. Later in my corporate career, I saw how this skill — connecting with people, empathizing, and communicating effectively — helped me move into leadership roles. I’d often take on tasks others avoided, like talking to customers or navigating conflicts, because I had built confidence in handling those interactions.

So, when did I realize emotional intelligence was a skill? 

It was through these cumulative experiences — being pushed out of my comfort zone as a child, “surviving” high-pressure moments like talking to air traffic control, and witnessing the tangible benefits of emotional intelligence in my career. Each step taught me that while some people may have a natural inclination for emotional intelligence, it’s something anyone can develop with practice and intentionality.

I started helping others build these skills early in my corporate life. I was a stark contrast to most of the engineers I worked with and was asked by many a manager to help coach my peers. I knew the only way to go about helping others was to truly understand what motivated them and what they wanted out of life — I needed to deeply connect with them. So I started mentoring programs, women’s networks, and social groups to bring people together. 

Across multiple industries, I was able to consistently help others find their voice, find their passion, and cultivate spaces where people felt valued, seen, and heard. This directly translated into high performing teams and allowed all team members to lead more fulfilling lives. 

I had also started doing work with students at my alma mater, University of Tennessee. I’d created a mentorship program for female engineering students, allowing them to truly see the art of the possible with their degree by pairing them with professional engineers who had done creative things with their degrees. After multiple students walked into the Director of Women in Engineering’s office saying they would not be graduating if it wasn’t for working with me, I got a call asking me to create something that could benefit all engineering students. 

So two years ago, I started Inside Out Engineering to teach the human skills we crave — self awareness, resiliency, and connection. And in my work with students and corporations alike, I’ve seen people emerge more confident and regulated with an ability to communicate that truly sets them apart from their peers. 

Inside Out Engineering is built on a foundation of meaningful connection. Knowing that we’re much stronger together, and that support is what helps us truly innovate not just in the corporate world, but in our own lives. 

My goal is to help more engineers, technically minded, and neurodivergent people find their own way to understand themselves and most importantly, find connection to the people around them. 

If this is something you find interesting or know you want to develop your emotional intelligence, follow along with me! 

I’ll be telling more of my stories in how I built this skill, stories of how this skill transformed the lives of others like us, along with tips and tools to bring into your life. 

And if you’re looking to accelerate your growth in emotional intelligence, book a call with me and we can build a pathway to your goals together! 

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